What kind of marriage do you want?

Marriage is an age old institution, but that does not mean that everyone has the same kind of marriage. Some people do things one way, and others another. What works for some, may not work for others. For example, a regular date night might work wonders for one marriage, but what about the marriage where the husband or wife is overseas on deployment? Is their marriage doomed to fail because they can't go out to a movie once a week? The following are a few keys to a healthy marriage, and things to do depending on the kind of marriage you want:

Friendship: All healthy relationships, marriage and otherwise, are based on a quality friendship. If you want to have a good marriage, you have to care about your spouse as you would a friend. You have to have those bonds that connect you, and help you enjoy one another.
Love: While a marriage can stay in tact without love, love is a critical ingredient to a happy, healthy, marriage. Love is a part of marriage that adds that little something extra, that helps you put up with the uglier sides of marriage, or the realities of life.
Respect: Respect is key to a good marriage because without it, resentment, hatred, frustration, and other negative feelings form much too quickly. Respecting their ideas, opinions, rights, individuality, and other characteristics is important. So, if you want a healthy relationship, ask about their dreams, goals, desires, and respect their answers. Respect them as people, as your spouse, etc.
Courtesy: Common courtesy sometimes goes out the window when you are married, but healthy marriages still respect courtesy, and practice it. Things like holding the door for your spouse, sparing them from your body functions (gas, bowel movements, etc.), not interrupting them when they are speaking, etc. all play a role in a healthy relationship.
Fun! Good relationships require some elements of fun. It is easy in marriages to get caught up in the everyday of life, finances, work, etc. and forget to show one another the good time you had when you were dating, or more carefree. So, do things you both enjoy. Rock climb, ice skate, go to shows, go to dinner, play fun games, or get involved in something that you enjoy and that you find that is so fun.
Happy: A healthy marriage requires some happiness. So, this means that both partners take the time to do things that they enjoy and that make them happy, whether it is alone or together. For example, if she loves to read, and he loves to play golf, then they may take an afternoon apart to do the thing that they enjoy and that makes them happy.
Individuality: Sometimes in a marriage, someone in the partnership gives up who they are to help them other person, or because they think that is how it is supposed to go. However, this usually spells out trouble down the line. Each part of the relationship needs to be whole on its own if they are going to be whole together. If you give up your dreams, you are eventually going to resent them for it. So, focus on keeping yourself and what makes you who you are, while you grow within your relationship.